STRIPPERS
Ever since men became generally unhappy with their lives (sometime in the early 1970s, I think), there have been strip clubs. And they're depressing, depressing places.
Well, now they're dangerous to boot. Apparently strippers kill unsuspecting johns and leave the skulls lying around like empty Coors cans in their childhood trailer park. No word on whether she ate their flesh first, but it's a safe assumption.
Please note in the linked article that the cops were responding to a guy who was threatening to "kill himself with a hammer", which is the most preposterous thing I've ever heard. Because if anyone did, there would be a band called 'Hammercide'. or maybe 'Hammercyde'.
Word to the wise: if a stripper offers to take you home, wear some sort of protective headgear or facemask so she can't chew your face off. Take it from Stinkrock.
Well, now they're dangerous to boot. Apparently strippers kill unsuspecting johns and leave the skulls lying around like empty Coors cans in their childhood trailer park. No word on whether she ate their flesh first, but it's a safe assumption.
Please note in the linked article that the cops were responding to a guy who was threatening to "kill himself with a hammer", which is the most preposterous thing I've ever heard. Because if anyone did, there would be a band called 'Hammercide'. or maybe 'Hammercyde'.
Word to the wise: if a stripper offers to take you home, wear some sort of protective headgear or facemask so she can't chew your face off. Take it from Stinkrock.
posted by stinkrock at 1:49 PM
6 Comments:
Please, please, please write a weepy drinking song with this line as the first line in the song:
"Ever since men became generally unhappy with their lives (sometime in the early 1970s, I think), there have been strip clubs."
CLASSIC!
That wasn't me. I wouldn't want to hear a song with those lyrics.
anonymous is a popular name.
I'm THE anonymous, asshole!
Nice try, "anonymous."
What a great site » »
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